Screams

I wrote this 5/6/08 to vent during/after an argument, to say the things that didn’t make it into the argument itself.

silent silent silent
she sits
furious and raging

silent hush quiet
don’t you dare speak to me like that
she sits she sits she sits
not my father she says
I am me I am me

Not my dad though we are alike

not my mother either
different different different

She doesn’t understand
she can be a bitch sometimes
she holds her thoughts inside

tight tight tight
not everyone deserves to know them
not everyone is safe to hold them
maybe she is ashamed of them
because they’re not good enough

for you for you for you
they’re not enough
you won’t like them

in her head she defends herself
not aloud
oh of course not
this life thing is new to her too
she hasn’t been here before
never never never

and maybe she is scared
that the mistakes she makes
will ruin it all

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